Lies I tell myself

"Honeybunchesofgoats" (honeybunche0fgoats)
08/22/2016 at 18:28 • Filed to: Jamon Serrano, Meatlopnik

“Sure it’s $22/lb cured ham, but I’ll make sandwiches. Entire days’ worth of meals will be filled with delicious cured ham. It’ll actually be cheaper than buying other foods! And I definitely will not stand at the kitchen counter and mindlessly consume slice after slice, each time telling myself that it’s the last slice while simultaneously justifying taking another slice so that I don’t leave a layer of plastic with one slice on top instead of two. No. I will not do that.”

I did do that. Just like I always do. Every. Damn. Time.

DISCUSSION (14)

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > Honeybunchesofgoats
08/22/2016 at 18:30

1. Take said cured ham

2. Wrap it around fresh mozzarella

3. ???

4. Profit.

Honeybunchesofgoats > TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts.
08/22/2016 at 18:34

But that’s a role I can assign to prosciutto. If I do that with jamon, then I’d be using one cured ham for two things when I could be using two cured hams for two things. Two cured hams are always preferable to one cured ham, that’s just basic math.

My citroen won't start > Honeybunchesofgoats
08/22/2016 at 18:40

I buy cured ham, roll many individual slices into some sort of ham roll and eat it while sitting on the floor next to an open fridge so I can get more.

Honeybunchesofgoats > My citroen won't start
08/22/2016 at 18:48

Kinja'd!!!

Svend > Honeybunchesofgoats
08/22/2016 at 18:50

I’m the same. I’ll cook a large gammon joint and then I’ll say right I’ll make a couple of sandwiches, put eat some while I’m making it, then some more as I put the rest in the fridge, then everytime I’m anywhere near the fridge I’ll cut off a few more thick slices to eat as I’m walking past. A 4-5Kg gammon will last me a day possibly a little bit longer if I’m being good.

Future next gen S2000 owner > Honeybunchesofgoats
08/22/2016 at 18:52

Heathen. A well cured salami is where is it at. Full of fat and flavor and goodness! You might as well be eating the 1.99 prepackaged “water-infused” mystery lunch meat.

Honeybunchesofgoats > Future next gen S2000 owner
08/22/2016 at 18:55

I have room in my heart for all cured meats. That’s like choosing one of your children as your favorite when all of your children could bring you joy equally if you sell them on the black market.

My citroen won't start > Honeybunchesofgoats
08/22/2016 at 18:57

Kinja'd!!!